Two Dogs in a Park

Two dogs meet in a park in Jerusalem one Friday afternoon. One is big, one is small. The small one seems unaware of the approach of the big dog and his master; she stands by her master, relaxed. Unworried. The big dog comes up warily, standing on a slight ramp above an oval of grass where the small dog sits, and then stands still – comically, both dogs now stare in the same direction for a few moments, drawing out mirthful exclamation from their owners. Then, the small dog moves from her position and the big dog jumps down to the grass from his vantage point, sniffing the ground from whence the small dog ventured.

The small dog turns around, no doubt having smelled the big dog the whole time, and makes her way to the big dog. Noses of the two dogs meet; then inspections of respective neck areas follow. Finally comes the butt-sniffing, and when the small female dog sniffs big male dog's rear a little too enthusiastically and repeatedly as they pace in a circle, the male dog suddenly jumps back onto the ramp where he stood before. Small dog does not follow. Owners move to collect their dogs after the meeting, and life goes on.

And there I stood, observing this rendez-vous, at a park near my apartment in Jerusalem with my hands full of groceries on a Friday afternoon, February 17, 2006. The last vestiges of a powerful hangover from the previous evening's birthday celebrations were barely felt at this moment, and I could only smile and laugh to myself as I witnessed that meeting of canine proportions; I then walked off to finish a couple of more errands as Jerusalem readied herself for the virtual shut down that is the Sabbath.

First, I was born...

“Disassociated Press? The public is demanding my life story? Well, I can tell that to you over the phone. You got a pencil ready? First I was born, which goes without saying….” – Bugs Bunny, What’s Up, Doc?

I seriously doubt that on February 16, 1981, my father and mother knew what I’d be doing a quarter-century into the future; it was unlikely my parents figured that I’d be celebrating my 25^th birthday in Israel, of all places. Come to think of it, I seriously doubt that my mom even could contemplate what she would be doing for her 25^th birthday, which was more than a year away for her when I was born. In any case, here I am. Twenty-five now, and in Israel. Don’t think I don’t see 30 on the horizon, as far away in reality as it may be.

I had a big thing typed up to commemorate the 25^th year of my existence, but I forgot it someplace and so this will have to do. In what was surely that work of art, I related how I feel kind of blessed to have so many opportunities to start 12-month periods with semi-clean slates. There is Rosh HaShana, and ten days after that Yom Kippur. Then, there is New Year’s Eve and New Year’s. Following that of course is my birthday, each February 16. Vintage Slim Slavin, depuis 1981. A very good year – for me, at least, because I was born!

Ah…to have multiple opportunities to start anew…well, kind of. Each occasion (the High Holy Days, New Year’s, Birthday) represents another chance to make a resolution for whatever 12 month period follows the event in the midst of other twelve-month periods underway. A continuous cycle of chances for as long as we have them. Till 120? One can only hope.

I hadn’t really decided on what my “birthday resolution” should be for the period between February 16, 2006 to February 16, 2007 when the clock struck midnight and I got a phone call not long after from my mother (it included a very stirring rendition of “Happy Birthday”). But after thinking about it, and how for whatever reason or other “success” has been on my mind, I’m going to do my best – with God’s help, and I don’t mean that abstractly – to succeed at whatever I really put my mind to.

Of course, one should do that all of the time if one is truly serious about success. And one person’s definition of success is quite often another’s definition of failure. Still, I think the occasion of a quarter-century of existence deserves a focus, a commemorative task of sorts for me – you know, not taking the next 12 months for granted, and all that.

Oh, and by the way, today I wore a “birthday suit” of sorts to work in Tel Aviv. You can see a picture of it with this entry. As you can see, I picked a colorful tie appropriate to a happy day: Looney Tunes.

How often do you get to dress up for your 25^th birthday, right?

Was Abraham a Monkey or a Pig?

You know, you really have to click on the link to understand what I’m about to say. So before you read any further, click on the link or paste it in your browser and read the article, and then come back here.

Hamas suicide bombers' videotape: 'We drink Jews' blood'
By Nadav Shragai
http://www.haaretz.com/hasen/spages/683165.html

Okay, so maybe you don’t have to click on the link. Maybe, when I say that caricatures of the Prophet Muhammad like the one above that caused the riots in the Muslim world and elsewhere might not be totally accurate, that the cartoons should have shown the Prophet as a vampire (which Jews have been accused of being, and have been drawn as, in the Arab media many times before) you’ll understand what I mean after reading this little bit:

"My message to the hated Jews: There is no God but Allah," (Idham Ahmed) Majala says. "We will hunt you everywhere, when you wake and when you sleep. We are a blood-drinking people and we know that there is no better blood than Jewish blood.”

You would think that would be enough. But, no…

"We will not leave you alone until we quench ourselves with your blood and we will quench the thirst of our children with your blood. We will not rest until you leave the lands of the Muslims."

Wow, pretty descriptive, right? It gets better. As Muslim fanatics run around burning flags and avoiding taking responsibility for their religion; as Muslims the world over complain that the world is intolerant toward Muslims, suicide bombers are releasing video tapes which go on to say, after putting the whole anti-Semitic “blood libel” to shame:

“By the life of Allah, we will destroy you. We will blow you up. We will take our revenge on you. We will purify our land of you, pigs, who have defiled our land. By the life of Allah, we will take our vengeance. We are carrying out this operation as harsh revenge against the sons of monkeys and pigs."

Now, I am at a loss to figure out how it is that the world can view so many Muslims as terrorists and intolerant people when their media depicts Jews with horns, they say “we are a blood drinking people”, and they call us the “sons of monkeys and pigs”.


I also have to wonder: what does that make them, if we are the sons of apes and swine? They claim to be descended from Ishmael, after all. Ishmael’s dad was Abraham, with his mom a servant; Abraham was also the father of Isaac with his wife, to whom Jews trace their lineage. We’re like, spiritually or literally related.

So in their eyes was the Patriarch Abraham a monkey...or a pig? And what does that make them?

Also, if Jews are the sons of monkeys and pigs, does that include just male Jews, or are female Jews also the sons of monkeys and pigs? And as someone pointed out to me just now, if Jews are the sons of pigs, and these guys want to drink Jewish blood, since ingesting anything to do with pigs is as forbidden to Muslims as it for Jews, aren’t they violating their own religious dietary laws?

You see, they haven’t adequately explained their murderous, hateful rhetoric to the world, just blown themselves up and made cryptic statements. I’m just looking for some clarification. Not expecting it, but looking for it.

I can’t imagine what it must be like to live in such poverty; to not be able to afford food because you’ve spent it all on bomb belts, guns and pitchers and glasses to serve Jew’s Blood in. What do you serve Jew’s Blood with anyway? Wine? Cheese? And these guys want the children in their societies to drink this stuff? What would you call the most powerful Muslim terrorist vampire, anyway…Ahmadcula? Does that then make an Israeli soldier who kills a suicide bomber "Moshe the Vampire Slayer"?

They call non-Muslims intolerant? They call Israelis Nazis?

These guys are the true representatives of Muhammad's message? I don't think so.

Sheesh.

Here’s that link again:
Hamas suicide bombers' videotape: 'We drink Jews' blood' http://www.haaretz.com/hasen/spages/683165.html